Monday, October 30, 2006

I've Moved

Well I moved over to Wordpress, you can now read my blog there, here is the link

  • My blog at Wordpress

  • Eventually I'm gonna delete this whole thing, but right now I'm trying to figure out how the heck to put all of my blogger friends as Daily Reads on my wordpress...geesh am I blonde or what?!?

    Hello it's MONDAY

    Yippe freaking skippy, it's Monday! I'm here at work, barely working, okay okay, not working at all.

    My tooth is once again infected, fun shtuff (i misspelt that on purpose). I get it pulled next tuesday, yea!

    Yesterday I flipped between A Haunted on discover channel and Th Scariest Places on Earth on Family Channel :) It was purdy cool. Watched home alone 2 times yesterday, I was a bit bored you think?

    Nothing really to report, I will however be making the transition over to wordpress i'm following Barngoddess' lead, blogger is just sucking majorly these days, and it's getting on my nerves. :)

    Have a nice monday!

    Saturday, October 28, 2006

    Not again...

    I was sitting in my recliner today and I rubbed my nose, and something fell off it, and then puss came out of the end of my nose. GOOD GAWD NOT AGAIN! I wonder if this is not a staff infection instead of a bite, where the hell did i get a staff infection?

    It doesn't hurt like the one back in May did, course it is also just starting out the EXACT same way as that bite did in May. That didn't hurt until later about 3 days after I found it.

    I have some meds that I'm taking for my never ending toothache (yes, still have that) so hopefully it will clear this up as well.

    Here are some pictures of what it looks like tonight, this is what it looked like in the beginning the last time you may not be able to tell anything is different about my nose in the pics, but, I can tell you this that my nose is swollen, and I look like rudolph the read nose pumpkin (since it's halloween and all :) ).

    Wish me luck in hopes that this doesn't make my whole face swell like it did the last time.

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    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    I got this over off my girls Barngoddess site. It's my sign candy (for the holidays)
    It is nothing like me I do not collect Pez Dispensers nor do I like Moundsy, ICK. LOL.

    Sagittarius Candy (Nov. 22 to Dec. 21)
    Sagittarius isn't the most materialistic sign in the world, but there are some things that these folks do collect. One of them is Pez dispensers. (These justice-lovers have a special fondness for the ones depicting superheroes.) Archers always dream of visiting distant lands, which is probably why they enjoy Mounds bars … nothing evokes swaying palm trees than that delicious coconut taste! Naturally, these jokesters adore Chuckles, too.

    Thursday, October 26, 2006

    A photo shoot

    I had a photo shoot with the dogs last night, I dabbled a little bit with the black and white feature on my camera. I've even turned in 1 picture into 2 different photo contests. I love black and white pictures!!!

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    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hostingthis is the one I entered into the contests.

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Wednesday, October 25, 2006

    "Bubba" and other True stories

    Okay, well Barngoddess has got me in the mood to talk about ghosts and hauntings, plus this is the time of year for it!

    I have a ghost, whom I have named "Bubba". Now I don't know if he is a male or a female spirit, but I Thought "Bubba" fit this entity just fine (is that the correct word? pfft I don't know).

    I first realized I had a ghost about 2 months after I moved into the apartment. Now, I don't know if the other tenants ever had a problem (my ex boyfriend and his wife) with "Bubba", but to me at first he was a nucience (sp?). Right before I went to sleep ever night I would feel my bed jar from the foot board. It jerked me awake every night. I got pissed one night and just yelled "WOULD YOU FREAKING QUIT!" Well since then it has not happened, lol.

    Things would disappear for days, the reappear no where in the vacinity that I left them. It was strange.

    A couple of times I have heard someone say my name, it's usually really late at night, and NO I wasn't asleep, normally watching tv or reading a book. It was a soft voice, not scary. A couple of times I answered to it, nimwhit, like "Bubba" would actually strike up a conversation. I don't know what I was thinking. One night I heard something crash it made an awful noise, I thought something fell and broke. I got out of the bed and started searching the house, nothing, found absolutely nothing on the floor anywhere. I just laughed and said "Bubba, are you fooling with me again?" and went back to bed. I think he/she likes when I talk to him/her. I have NEVER felt like i was in the presence of an evil being, it's always a nice feeling, kinda of a warm feeling, like maybe this spirit was an elderly person or even a child (discussed later in this post) that just doesn't know that they are dead, I have not had the heart to tell him/her to go to the other side, I kinda like him/her there.

    When I first started dating James, "Bubba" acted up alot. Never when James was around, he doesn't believe I have a ghost/spirit. But whenever James would leave things started happening. Books a whole row of them falling off the book shelf, Bread being moved from counter to floor, doors shutting by themselves, and the dogs would run in the kitchen and bark their heads off for no reason. I sat down one night in the middle of my living room floor with all the lights off and had a discussion with "Bubba", it went like this. "Bubba, I do not know why you are upset that I have a boyfriend, he is not going to hurt me or you, infact he doesn't believe you exist. I would greatly appreciate if you would not throw books off shelves or put my expensive (sarah lee) bread on the floor. Now I'm going to bed, you be good". Well the bread has never hit the floor again, but it hides from me every now and then.

    One time I had just gotten all my dr suess books from when I was a child onto the shelf. I was on the phone and all the dr. suess books fell off the shelf, just them, no others and "Green eggs and ham" was on the floor opened, I went to pick them up and the page turned all by itself. K, that freaked me out. I mean who ever REALL expeirences a page turning by itself? The ceiling fan was on but on low, and it was winter so the windows were shut, the only draft that comes through is through the air conditioner unit, but never strong enough to turn a page in a book. I jumped back, and a little scream escaped my throat, then the dogs started running around barking and carring on. I picked up the books and put them back on the shelf, and went on with my business, a few seconds later I heard a "THUMP" and went back into the living room to see the SAME book on the floor opened up to the same page, I was okay, obviously SOME one wanted to read this book. So I gathered the book up and sat on the couch and read "Green Eggs and Ham" outloud feeling like a complete idiot. When I was done I put it back on the shelf and went on my way. I was cleaning the bathroom and I heard another thumb, I sighed, went back into the living room and another Dr. Suess book was on the floor opened, I ended up reading that book also, and I said after that book "No more I have things I need to do". No more books fell for the rest of the day.

    I have not heard much of "Bubba" lately, but last night he/she let themselves be known something in my walk in closet fell from the top shelf to the floor. It could not of fallen by itself, it was way back in the corner, and something was in front of it, it was a porcelian doll still in it's box, she did not break, I put her back up on the shelf. I kinda get a feeling that this is a kid i'm dealing with or some immature spirit. LOL.


    I lived in Wilson Hall while tending Northeastern State Univeristy In Oklahoma, in Tahlequah. THis was an Indian college and when it first started it was a womens college and alot of Native Americans attended it(i think at first it was purely a Native American college, but I could be wrong, laura if you still read this tell me if i'm wrong). It is a very old college campus, and there have been stories lurking around for years that there are hauntings in some of the buildings, in our dorm it was the Head Mistress (i think) whose name was Flo. They named the Cafe "Flos" in our dorm. People would say they saw an older woman lurking the halls checking on her "students" she would be upset if a girl and a boy were in the same room at night alone together. I lived in a co-ed dorm, my neighbors were boys. I never thought much of Flo, until one day I was in my dorm room, by myself and my glue stick took a flying leap off my desk and on the floor. I looked around and I didn't see anything, I picked up the glue stick and put it back on my desk. I went to the bathroom then and came back and it was back on the floor, but on the other side of the room. Okay, I was a little freaked out. I told laura about this and she was a little freaked out. I was sleeping one night, Laura had gone home for the weekend, this would be the one weekend I DID NOT GO HOME, and even though I always locked our door when I went to sleep the door kept creeping open, I doubled checked to make sure that the locked actually worked, it did, i couldn't understand why it kept opening. Then I heard a knock on the door (i think laura was there but I'm not for sure) but there were no shadows of feet from the hall way, course I never answered it I was to scared!!! This was a time where I didn't feel all that great with this spirit lurking around, it felt like she was mad at me for something.


    There have been rumors that Laura's mom and stepdads house was haunted by a woman figure a young woman figure. Their house is a Victorian style home, and was once back when it was built was a doctors office, and it was said that a young girl died there, either from cancer or from birth, the story has never been TOO clear as to what it was.

    The previous tenants of the home stated that they would see a girl standing on the second landing of the stairs. Or the piano playing and everyone was a sleep. Her step father stated that he's seen her 2 times, and they've heard the balls breaking on the pool table and everyone was asleep or the piano was playing by it self.

    One day Laura, my cousin C, and myself were fooling around on the Ouji board, and we made contact (however i do not really believe in the Ouji board) with this ghost. She stated that she was next to the door, we were in the dark and we were scared poopless. I said yeah right, and then my chair started moving back in forth (i was in a swivle desk chair) and my feet were flat on the floor. Laura and C thought that I was faking but then they could see my face in the moonlight and KNOW that I was not fooling with them, "No, guys, I am not doing this." then the curtains over the door moved like someone was standing behind them, it was freaky. I said "oh alright I don't believe this" and turned on the ceiling light. And loudly I said "if you are really here I want you to move this piece of chalk (billards chalk)." we all looked at it and it didn't move. I said "Fine whatever" and we went back to the ouji board, and i asked "can you move the chalk" and it said 'yes' and I said 'fine prove it' and it said 'hand' and i was like WTF? Then I realized she wanted it in someones hand, why I have no idea. So i got back up and C turned on the light and I put the chalk in my hand, my hand was out flat. I said "go head move it" and it took a flying leap out of my hand, and NO i didn't do it, my hand never moved from the position that it was first in, both Laura and C saw it, and they were totally freaked. I felt this cold air on my hand before the chalk moved. Needless to say that i never doubted that she was there, i can't remmber her darn name, she had told me once at another friends house when i made contact with her before on the ouji board before this night. She stated taht in my past life (which I don't believe in) I was friends with her and Laura, and we had 2 little chidlren who were friends. She told me her name, Laura, if you read this let me know what her name was I started with a J or an R but i can't remember.


    I was 13 and I was a really religous thirteen year old. My friends and I went inside this abandoned work site and went into the basement and we saw all these devil worshiping things spray painted on the walls. Even entering the building freaked me out I felt this dark presence just when I entered the door, I didn't want to go in, but I went not look like i was a wimp. When we went down to the basement it smelt so bad, like rotting flesh, my heart started pounding, I started sweating, and I couldn't breath. I ran up the stairs and waited for the others to come outside. They explored more than I had thought they would, it was 2 girls and 3 boys besides myself.

    I wasn't able to watch scary movies at this age because they REALLY scared me, so this in itself was tramatizing. I felt this evil presence down in the basement, and I felt that I carried it home with me. The other kids felt the same way but yet they stayed in there for that long.

    When I was younger and I would feel really scared and feel overwhelmed with evil spirits (i felt them a lot when I was a kid, not so much anymore, I think kids notice more then adults) I would chant in my head over and over "i love Jesus, I love Jesus, you can't have me I love Jesus" and I would feel much better.

    I was in bed trying to go to sleep about a week after the "exploring" and I had this scary feeling over me and I chanted my chant and it wasn't working, I looked up and something black and thick like smoke, was floating above my bed, I said out loud "I love Jesus, I love Jesus" and it like angered this floating being and they came crashing down on me, I couldn't breath I felt like someone was strangling me. My arms were pinned down stretched out on either side of me, I couldn't move them. I was joking, and it felt like some one was sitting on my chest. I just kept repeating in my head "i love jesus i love jesus" and then I saw this flash of light out of the corner of my eye (now it could of been a cars head light but I'd like to think it was a gaurdian angel), and when that light flashed the "evil" presence was gone.

    I woke up the next morning with bruises on both my arms and on my throat, I could never explain to my mother what actually happened to me, so i just said "i dunno where they came from" half the truth I really didn't know! But to this day I still feel that maybe a deamon was either trying to kill me or something worse, which I don't want to think about.

    And that my friends is a true story, and I still can remember how i felt and what I thought, and I still feel the sweat rolling down my face like it just happened to me yesterday.

    A Survey

    1. What is your best friend's grandma's name?

    2. Where is the weirdest place you have a mole?
    Hmm. No comment.

    3. Who was the hottest teacher you've ever had?
    I had two hot teachers one in coffeyville and one at oklahoma union. Mr. Smith from the ville, and Mr. Thompson from OU, and they were both math teachers, go figure!

    4. Have you ever made out in a movie theater?
    Once or twice.

    5. What body part do you wash first?
    My Tail

    6. Do you hover over the toilet in public bathrooms?
    I try to stay away from the public bathrooms *restrooms* as much as possible, but if i can not wait or am forced to go in (don't know why I'd be forced) then I try to stay away from the Toilet as you never know who's a$$ was on there last, YUCKIE.

    7. What's the strangest talent you have?
    All animals gather around me, i'm the modern day Snow White, without the black silky hair, snow white skin or the body!

    8. Do you have an innie or an outtie?

    9. What's your favorite flavored Pringles?
    I'm strange I don't like pringles

    10. Have you ever been tied up? Do you want to be?
    What kind of question is this?! You perv!

    11. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for?
    I'm almost 27 years old...grounded?!?! PFFT.

    12. Do you parallel park or drive around the block?
    Actually I just purchased one of those 80,000 dollar lexus with the 700 dollar parellel parking feature, where it parallel parks itself.

    13. Have you ever had two dates in one night?

    14. How many times have you been cussed out?
    You don't have my current job, it's an everyday occurance (sp?)

    15. Which shoe do you put on first?
    I don't know my left? is this a trick question?

    16. In one word, describe your a**.

    17. Have you ever been to a gay bar?

    18. Girls: Out of Madonna, Aunt Bee, Oprah Winfrey, and Paris Hilton, who are you most like?
    Aunt Bee. Out of the choices Oprah Winfrey is rich which ain't me, Paris Hilton is a skanky slut, again not me, and Madonna is looney, although I don't want to claim myself as looney where others may think I am, that's not me.

    19. Is there one thing all of your love interests have had in common?

    20. Did you French kiss before you were 16?
    Yes I did, infact that is how the big "sex" talk came about. Do you realize that if you french kiss you'll have a baby?!? Well that's what I was told...some how I haven't gotten pregnant yet, hmmm....was my mom on crack?

    21. Have you ever been cow-tipping or snipe-hunting?
    Snipe-hunting wtf is that? Is that where you hunt snipers? Cow-tipping yes I have done that.

    22. Who is the last person you usually think about before you fall asleep?
    I don't know I'm usually thinking "damit go to sleep" so i guess sleep for me is considered a person.

    23. Have you ever had a poem written about you?
    Yes, my father wrote a poem the after adopting me it is in a fram hanging in my house, I love my daddy!

    24. You're in a public bathroom and there's no toilet paper. What do you do?
    Okay, who the heck doesn't check the toilet paper dispenser before using the restroom? I think a guy wrote this survey....

    25. Have you ever found anything in your parent's bedroom that was questionable?
    Um no, and I think if I had I'd be more disturbed then what I am already.

    26. What was your childhood nickname?
    Shortcake or Nimwhit take your pick.

    27. When is the last time you played the air guitar?
    when I was a kid

    28. Have you ever peeked into the opposite sex's locker room?
    Everytime I walk by. ;)

    29. What's the weirdest thing you've done while driving?
    Well I tend to just drive, as the other occupants in their cars are just freaking out because I'm on the road...

    30. Have you ever bitten your toenails?
    what the hell?? Who does that? I don't bend that way.

    31. How do you eat your cookies?
    What kind of question is that? Fast? (kept answer liked it)

    32. When working out at the gym, do you wear a belt?
    Know i have no problem keeping my fat a$$ in my pants. (yes, i know what the questions is asking).

    33. Name something you do when you're alone that you wouldn't do in front of anyone.
    I pick my nose.

    34. Girls: Do you shave your toes? Guys: Do you shave your chest?
    Yes, I have, I've also shaved my arms, swimmers go to the extreme when it comes to shaving!

    35. Have you ever played doctor and nurse or a similar game?
    Oh yeah, got in trouble for doing that once.

    36. How many drinks does it take before you get drunk?
    i'm a light weight so i would have to say um 3?

    37. Have you ever sniffed an animal's butt? What kind?
    What kind of person ACTUALLY does that? You have to be on some strong crack to do such a disgusting horrid thing.

    38. How often do you clean out your ears?
    When I lose my ability to hear due to all the wax build-up.

    39. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper?
    Fold (goes with my OCD)

    40. About how many times a day do you pick a wedgie?
    2, maybe 3. What kind of question is this?

    41. Do you have any strange phobias?
    I hate spiders, yuckie stupid things that seem to chase you because they know you are gonna sqaush them!! YUCK

    42. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?
    My finger

    43. What is the stupidest thing you've ever done at a bar or a party?
    fall flat on my face.

    44. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted?

    45. Have you ever called your love interest by an ex's name?
    no, i don't think so

    47. Have you ever played naked twister?
    Joked around about it a lot but never actually did it.

    48. Have you ever been drunk at work?
    I've come to work still drunk does that count?

    49. Have you ever found your date's/lover's brother or sister more attractive?

    50. Do you want to bring sexy back?
    what kind of question is this? ahhh Sure i guess.

    Tuesday, October 24, 2006


    Whatever I had this weekend got much much worse sunday night around 3 am. I had the stomach virus, EWWWW. I went to work yesterday only to leave an hour and half into my day to go home and back to bed. I got home around 10 am yesterday and slept until 3pm and then got up and piddled around, and went back to be for the remaining day and evening. Went to sleep around 10:30 pm, and woke up at 7 am. I have had nothing to eat in 24 hrs, other than a French Vanilla hot chocolate.

    I'm starving right now, so I assume that is a good thing!! Lunch is in about an hour.


    I'll post more later!

    Sunday, October 22, 2006

    It's cold and ouch!

    the first picture is of Katie, I had just taken the towels and blankets out of the dryer, and she thought it was cold in the house, and decided she was going to burrow herself under the warm blankets!!

    The second picture is of my shin, when did i do this?!?! Yeah, i don't know either!! I swear I think I sleep walk!!!

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Bed Sores

    Well not yet anyways. I have not ventured far from the bed this weekend. I have a killer headache that I can not get rid of. It's one of those nasty sinus ones. I have not heard from J all weekend, he hasn't even been online, which to me is strange. Course I'm one of those girls who always has it stuck in the back of their heads that something isn't right. I know I need not to think like that, but I can't help it.

    I finally started laundry, good gawd, for one person I manage to have a ton of laundry. Ypu'd think with a washer and dryer of my own I would stop doing laundry only one time a week and do a little bit throughout the week, um nope!

    I think the doggies are tired of laying in bed with me, poor things, they haven't had much exercise in the last 3 days, I just don't feel like taking them out for our walks that we have on the weekends. I was going to go to the walking trail this weekend and take some shots of the beautiful trees, as they are all changing colors. Nope, haven't done that either. I'm not depressed, I don't think, I think I'm just really run down, and need a break for right now. I kinda wish they would just lay us off and I could have a little vacation before I have to go out and beat the streets to find another job. YUCK.

    So how was everyone else's weekend? lol.

    I finally broke down and turned on the gas heather in the front room, it's on low. I need to get one of those carbon minoxide (sp?) dectors just to be safe. I will not turn on the electric heaters not until absolutely necessary. I'm a stickler on that, because of the way our electric company is screwing us around, our electric company is our town, and they "ran out" of electricity in the summer because of the heat, and now we are paying to the piper on that. It's not fair really. I don't see how they expect the people who live on fixed incomes to afford such out rages prices in electricity. Good Gawd.

    I'm leaving with a few pics of the doggies, I think the expression on katies face explains their misery! LOL. Also, sorry but you can't really SEE Jade's experssion, all you can see are you glowing eyes! LOL. And i really need to reset the date of the pictures huh?!?! I mean it's not 1/whatever/2004 is it?!?!? GEESH SUSAN!

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    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Saturday, October 21, 2006

    The Phone Call...

    Believe it or not that there was someone before J, someone that had my heart from the word go, but, this someone and I couldn't no matter how we tried, to seem to be together. His name was Nate, and he was supposed to get married this month, to the girl that came between us. Out of the blue last night he emailed me stating that he wanted my phone number he needed to talk to me. So i gave him my phone number, and anxiously awaited the phone call. In about 20 minutes he called me. This is how it played out.

    He said that she called off the wedding 3 weeks before it was to happen, because she thought he was cheating, and I believe him when he said he didn't except for with me, and that was a year and a half ago, around July 1 of 2005, she has told lies to his family so they have not called him in over 1 month.

    He asked me what i was doing told him i'm about to get laid off and he said "want to move to iowa, i have a house and make 800 bucks a week (damn)" i said "well, honey I would but i'm back with my ex, and things are going good right now" and he said "i had a feeling that you were going to say that"

    He said that he felt bad for not going through with what he told me, which was for him to move down here, and live with me, he would of been 10 times happier than he was ever with her (hehe i'm that good), and he is sorry he f*ed it up.

    I said 'hey it's okay what we did was in the heat of the moment, it was like a snap of a finger, us being together just wasn't in the plans at the time"

    He apologized serveral times, and I told him "Nate, I don't want the friendship we had to go away, i will always be here, my phone is always opened to you" and he said "don't be surprised if i call you once a week" and i said "that is fine I'm your friend if you need someone to talk to then I am here, but I can not and will not leave j" and he said "i would never ask you to do that" and i said "good, because if it is not meant to be with him i want it to die on its own I am trying hard to get things back where they were" and he said "i understand totally"

    i said we weren't meant to be together, but maybe we were just meant to be friends, and he understood compeletely, and i said "if i were not with J right now don't think in a heart beat i wouldn't move up there with you, because I would" and I actually WOULD do it, my parents would flip the hell out, but o'well, lol, i also said "i'm in love with j and right now all I see is him, and no one else." and then i added "man, this could of happened like a month ago!"


    It was hard really hard not to just crumble, hard for me to just say forget my life here and move to Iowa and be with him. But in reality I can not do that, and will not do that to J, it would not be fair, I mean we are trying right now, and we are both in the agreement that we will fight hard for what we had. I just think it is strange how things play out. How he was supposedly "happy" with her (nate) and that they were going to get married this month, and how i was supposed to get married in May, but didn't and now am back with J.

    I think I handled it well, but I still fill a tad bit guilty for even taking the phone call, but it was closure, closure we both needed. When we hung up he said "I love you" and I said "I love you" back, now that may have been the wrong thing to do, but honestly I still do, is it possible to love 2 people at the same time? Granted I have more love in my heart for J, but there is still part of my heart that will always be Nates. We have known each other for 3 years, and dated for about 1 1/2 years. Nates last phone call was last october, he said that he would call me on a friday night, he never did, and then the email was the first time I've heard from him since he announced in March that he was getting married. Last october was when I found J. It was like God closed one door, and then opened up another for me.

    J doesn't know about Nate, and I don't think he ever will. I can not find the words to bring up Nate to J. There is something there with Nate that is so personal to me that I don't want to scare J. Am I bad for having these thoughts? Or is this just how closure goes??

    Friday, October 20, 2006

    HO, HUM.

    So, it's Friday. Yeah, it is, woohoo. Yeah, that didn't sound very conviencing did it? I'm not feeling so hot. I keep getting hot and cold flashes, and what I really want to do is be in bed curled up with the pups, and sipping a hot cup of tea. But, unfortunialty I'm stuck here at work. Yea! No, not really (on the Yea! part).

    I have no nose, well, I have a nose, I just can't breath through it right now. Well, I can breath through the left nostril just fine it's the right one that is all clogged, yeah, I know, you didn't really want to know that. SORRY!

    I watched the Omen last night, the new remake, yeah, it's not worth your time wasting watching that movie. BOREINGVILLE.

    That's really pretty much it, I know, I know, what a post huh?!?

    Thursday, October 19, 2006

    Tired, cold, and have a headache

    Photobucket - Video and Image HostingWell I went to be pretty early last night, I had a major migraine sneak up on me last night. I still Have it today. It's the change of the weather, I get sick whenever the seasons change, it stinks really.

    I'm tired too, must be the head ache, and I'm cold, which must be the headache again, I want to go home (I was supposed to have today off, but um somehow that got thrown out the window, pfft).

    Everyone here has an interview with the Airplane plant, BUT, me. I don't have one. O'shittin well. I guess I'm not good enough if I don't have someone on the inside pushing my resume like people do when they push drugs. I went through the job service, and hopefully they will call me, if not another factory is hiring they make plastic pipes. YEW, what fun. I don't care I just need a job that I make the amount or more then what I make now. I don't want to loose everything I have.

    It's going to be a shit day in the neighborhood, and I may just go home this afternoon, forget everyone else at this job, I have a headache from hell and I want to go to bed!.


    Photobucket - Video and Image HostingDescription: Silverfish are always wingless and are silvery to brown in color because their bodies are covered with fine scales. They are generally soft bodied. Adults are up to 3/4 inch long, flattened from top to bottom, elongated and oval in shape, have three long tail projections and two long antennae.

    Habitat, Food Source(s): Silverfish are chewing insects and general feeders but prefer carbohydrates and protein, including flour, dried meat, rolled oats, paper and even glue. They and can survive long periods, sometimes over a year, without food but are sensitive to moisture and require a high humidity (75% to 90%) to survive. They also have a temperature preference between 70 and 80 degrees F. They are fast running and mostly active at night and generally prefer lower levels in homes, but may be found in attics.

    GOOD GAWD WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG...I contribute my silverfish problem to the garage below me that is pack full of shit. Not my shit, but shit non-the-less. This is disgusting, I'm a clean person, why do I have this problem?

    Wednesday, October 18, 2006

    Bats, and other things

    Well lets see the Video blog I looked horrible!!! I either look stoned out of my mind or exhausted, and I know I wasn't stoned, so must of been the exhausted part.

    See a couple of nights ago I went outside with dogs in tow to let them use the potty, and I heard fluttering in the Evergreen tree above me. This is one BIG evergreen (i think that is what it is, i'm pretty much stupid on trees). I didn't think much of it then, just went along my business and so did the doggies.

    Last night I go outside and I hit the screen door on one of the branches, and this black thing came and dive bombed my head, it was around 9 o'clock so it was pretty dark outside, and when I bent down to put the pups in their outside pen, it did it again. I got a look at it, it resembled a bat, yes, a bat. I about pissed my pants, Jade was extremely scared out of skin, and didn't want to go potty. Katie, was oblivious to the whole ordeal, she had business to take care of.

    I come back inside and IM James. "Are there bats in this area?" and came back with "Yes." and I said "I just had one dive bomb my head" and he laughed. I didn't think it was that funny myself. So I have a bat in my tree, just great. I wonder if the dog catcher will take in bats. I know I will not invite the bat in, so that way there will be no chance of him sucking my blood and turning me into a vampire, LOL.

    Today I've been in an off mood. Rachel knows this. My job is beginning to suck sweaty goat balls, graphic huh? I have cried 3 times while sitting at my desk at work. No one noticed, I can cry very quietly, the tears just build up and fall out of my eye sockets. I don't know what is wrong with me right now. It's like im PRE Pmsing or something. My lower back is killing me, I can't seem to find a comfortable posistion to sit, and I basically just want to go home, and never come back to this place ever again. But, I know that this can not happen, I mean I DO have to get a paycheck somehow. I thought about working the corner of our busiest street in town to earn some extra cash flow. But, I don't know.

    I will post more video blogs, but I will make sure I look 100 percent better than I did last night, good gawd, can we say catirpillar (sp?) crawling across my forhead, GEESH!!!

    Tuesday, October 17, 2006

    How do you take your Cawwfee?



    Love can be complicated
    Love can be emotional
    Love can be stressful
    Love can be happiness
    Love can be saddness
    Love can be loneliness
    Love can be brutal
    Love can be sickness
    Love can be ANYTHING.

    Shew, that took a lot out of me! TEEHEE. Like I said earlier today I'm in ONE WEIRD MOOD, SCARY HUH?!?!?!


    IM STUPID : LoL i forgot to mention that the link below are not 'real' haunted houses they are haunted houses that you attend to get the poop scare out of you! SORRY!!!

    Uh, yes, I realize that the title is misspelt that's an inside joke between and a blogger buddy :) *Wink*

    Well today has not been a very good start. I rolled over and glanced at the clock and sat straight up in bed and said "Uh...shit!" and got on the phone and called my supervisor telling her I was running late. Yeah, I woke up at 7:15 this morning, and I believed I got around in record time! I was only 3 minutes late to work this morning.

    On my yahoo home page I go this link you'll have to copy and paste it into your browser because for some odd readon blogger is being a 'tard and won't let me do the html thing for it, damn blogger, i swear!

    It's a link to haunted houses, it's pretty cool, and I know that BG will appreciate it, love ya girl!

    Also there is a new girl in town, her name is MissSexyAnnie1, she is from New York, I stumbled upon her blog just searching through about New York (which is a city that I would love to visit one of these days), she just started her blog, but to me she's very very funny, well to me anyways. So maybe you should go over and check her out!

    Other than that i guess no news is good news eh? Well I'm sitting here bored off my ever widening rump at work, so Im gonna go look at that link again, maybe I missed something, LOL.

    Y'all have a nice Tuesday, :) Peace Love and well you know the rest!

    I'm in a weird mood today, frankly I'm starting to scare myself!

    Monday, October 16, 2006

    Nothing Interesing...

    So, how was everyones weekend? Mine was good :) J and I went to Tulsa on Saturday (and yes I forgot to take the damn camera, GRRR). He had to go to some car shops and stuff, not my ideal of fun, lol, but I tagged along anyways. We ate at the Olive Garden, my FAVORITE place to eat. I had the Garlic Herb Chicken and Broccoli with garlic cheese sauce = YUMMIEE!!!

    Then we went to bartlesville (Rebecca B-vill Wally World is Bartlesville Wal-Mart, it's a town sout of where I live about 45 minutes away) and went to Big Lots, and came out with nuffin, lol. Then we went to kmart, and all I bought was some chap stick for my oh so chapped lips, gawd they hurt like hell. They don't hurt as much as they did friday and saturday. I blamed it on J, said he kissed me to much, lol. He said "Uh, Whatevah!" hehehe.

    We have talked a lot about what went went sour that last month that we were together the first time. I said well I went pyscho, and he said well I didn't help the situation, eyup (hehe rach that's for you!) but it wasn't all of it. We both have found out that we moved to fast, way to fast, I think if we had maybe pushed the wedding back 3 or 4 months we would of been married now. But, course I acted on a whim, and flew off the handle, like I always do. But we are both in agreeance (is that a word?) that we are going to make this work, and try hard this time. I told him that we will never forget what happened but we need to figure out why and how to stop it from happening again, and move on from it, he agreed with me. Good, at least we agree on SOMETHING, lol.

    If I were one to kiss and tell I would tell you a WHOLE lot more, but I'm not that open on this blog to everyone to know the inner most of me! LOL. So we'll just leave what I've said above as it.

    I finished my book The Switch, yes, this book I actually started back in in like June but I couldn't get into it, which has happened before with one of Sandra Browns books, but then I picked it back up a week ago yesterday, and it was an 800 page book, and I'm glad I read it, it was OOOOHHHH SSSOOOO good, if you like Romance Thrillers, Sandra Brown is the one that you need to read. But you have to be careful she also rights full out romance novels, and THEY ARE GRAPHIC, so I would say stick with the Romance Thrillers from her, they have graphic scenes in them, but not as many, it's more like are these 2 characters EVA gonna get together!!! LOL.

    here's her link to her website,
  • Sandra Brown
  • .

    And here is the description of the book The Switch (All i did was copy it from her site, so if I gave to much info don't blame me blame her website, lol).

    Identical twins fascinate us. Whenever you see identical twins, don’t you stop and gawk, just a little? They’re arresting. Even with the recent increase in multiple births where there’s a strong family resemblance among the babies, two people who are virtually indistinguishable capture our attention.

    Not too long ago, I attended a wedding. At the reception I was seated with a woman, who was an identical twin, and her nephew, who was also an identical twin. This family had three sets of identical twins within two generations!

    Being my nosy self, I barraged them with questions, questions I’m certain they’d been asked a thousand times. But they were good-natured and told me stories about mistaken identity, childhood pranks, and the strange telepathy
    between twins.

    For instance, the woman said she and her twin — on more than one occasion– had arrived somewhere wearing matching dresses, without either of them knowing that the other owned that particular dress. Unintentionally,
    they’d even bought identical sofas. The young man said that he and his brother constantly complete one another’s sentences and can practically read each other’s mind.

    Can you see why this conversation fanned my imagination?

    In THE SWITCH the twins are Gillian and Melina Lloyd, who are identical, almost interchangeable. Both are successful businesswomen. Both are single.

    But in one regard there is a dissimilarity:
    They share the same impulses, but Melina acted on them. She plunged headfirst off the high diving board. Gillian would stand with her toes curled over the end of it until dared to dive in.

    Another difference between them is that Gillian wants a child. Feeling her biological clock ticking, she opts to undergo artificial insemination using donor sperm. The story opens on the day she is inseminated.

    The male protagonist is Christopher “Chief” Hart. He is the first Native American astronaut, NASA’s poster boy, a national figure. In Dallas to collect an award, Chief’s media escort is Melina Lloyd. Or is it?

    Chief’s life first collides, then becomes intertwined with that of the twins. A seemingly harmless prank results in disaster. And what appears at first to be an open-and-shut murder investigation, ultimately leads to a compound in the mountains of New Mexico where a madman is engineering his “new world order.” If he’s only partially successful, the consequences would be catastrophic and global in scope.

    The subject matter is as contemporary as today’s headlines. The love story is . . . Well, if you’re a repeat reader, you know how I feel about falling in love.

    Okay, you’re right. The title gives away the plot . . . but only a part of it.

    Saturday, October 14, 2006

    Scared, cold and tired....blah

    Well J and I had a nice evening, I went over there around 8:30 this evening, we then went to bville to walmart, where he needed some things. We got back home around Midnight. I headed back home where I just about side swibed some poor bastard as he was in my blind spot. I truly felt sorry but thankfully i corrected myself before I actually did any damage, I'm sure he about pissed his pants (pissed is um my word of choice it seems, lol).

    I came home to a pretty cold home, I'm not turning my heaters on until I absolutely have to! I have an electric blanket so at least i will not freeze while I sleep.

    I watched the new horror movie "Stay Alive" and well um...I'm scared now LOL. I'm glad I'm not a gamer! Not that a game can come to life or anything, but still the concept of the movie freaked my crap out! I don't mind horror movies, I love to watch them actually, but this is the first one ever that I've actually talked to the damn tv, telling the poor bastards to get out!! LOL, I went a bit insane on them, lol. It's a pretty good flick if you are into horror!! The scariest part to me was Angelina Jolie's brother, not his character just him, himself. He's a little freaky!!! LOL.

    Well like the title states I'm Scared, freezing to death (my body is shivering as I type this you can see my breath, it's a sad ordeal really, lol, I need to NOT be stubborn and turn the heat on), and I'm extremely tired.

    So until next post, you all have an absolutely lovely Early Saturday morning!!! NIGHTERS!!!

    Friday, October 13, 2006

    A little Story if you will...

    On a chilly night in October, five high school students were standing line waiting to get into a "Haunted Forrest". This would be the first time for the three young girls to go through but the two young men have been through with it in the years past. We will call the girls Anna, Becky, and Candy and the two boys Doug and Eric.

    Anna was dating boy Doug, Becky was dating Eric, and Candy was there with to be part of the "gang". The five of them were waiting in line goofing around while they were waiting. In the midst of the "forrest" they heard all types of noises, screaming, goblims moaning you know the basic type of sounds that come with the Haunted House scene. It was getting pretty chilly outside and Anna was getting pretty darn cold, as she was dressed up as a black cat, and had a leatard and tights on, and the only heavy thing she was wearing was her high school letter jacket. Becky and Candy told her she would need to dress warmer than what she did, and she being her usual self didn't care to listen. Now, she wished she had. Doug put his arms around her waist and tried to help her stay warm. "Sorry you're so cold honey." He said as he kissed the top of her head. "Yeah, well it's not your fault, I'm the blonde one that decided that she could wear hardly nothing and NOT get cold." She said as she shivered.

    They waited in line for what seemed 100 years before it was their turn to be able to pay the ten dollars a piece to get into the attraction. As Doug pulled out his wallet he stated "Ouch" as in giving up twenty bucks hurt him. Anna looked at him and said "I can pay your back." Dough kissed her forehead and said "Sweetie, that's sweet, but I was just joking around." The person at the gate said that they take seven participants at a time, and this meant that their group and two others would be going in next. The five of them didn't want anyone else, but they did not argue. So the person at the gate yelled if there were just a party of two, and they heard some voices in the back stating that they are just a party of two. These two little girls couldn't be more than 12 or 13 years old came running up. Eric "F'in great" he mutterd, Becky nucked her elbow in his ribs. " will be alright. It's not like we are supposed to babysit them or anything" She whipsered. The person at the gate too down each of their names. Which Anna thought was strange, but just shrugged her shoulders. "You'll be able to enter in about 5 minutes." The person at the gate replied.

    Finally they were allowed to enter the attraction. The first stop was a fortune teller, where she gave everyone their fortunes for the attraction, each in their own way was scary as hell. Then it was a grave yard that came up next, they were looking around in the foggy mist at all the tombstones and goblins that were running around it, and over to the far right they say some one digging a fresh new grave, then all the sudden a spot light came on flooding the goblin digging the grave, and the tombstone. Then someone out of the darkness came up, it was the Grim Reaper, and he said in an eerie voice, "Is there a Candy in this group, if there is can she please step up." All of them pushed Candy out front of the crowd, and she shook her head and pleaded with them not to do so. "Candy.." the Grim Reaper said, "tonight Is the night that you have met your destiny. I'm hear to take you to your freshly dug grave, please put out your hand." The grim reaper put his black gloved hand out and Candy just about peed her pants, and screamed and hid behind Doug and Eric. The Grim Reaper laughted, "Run if you will Candy, but you will meet your fate tonight, you will end up in this grave, trust me, you will" he said as the group was being ushered on to the next scary event.

    They were forced to walk over what seemed quick sand, Becky and Anna screamed, Anna being the clutz she was fell over and tried to get back up, Doug bent down and helped her up, all while laughing at her. She scolded him for laughing at her. Through then entire "forrest" Anna and Candy just about peed their pants at each and every one, especially at the Canabal family who kept trying to get Anna to come into the cage so they could eat her lovely looking arms, she freaked and she actual drew blood from Dougs hand when her nails embedded into it. "OUCH, hey watch it!" He scolded her, but she didn't even notice.

    By the end of the attraction all the girls, even the 2 that were stuck with their group wanted it to be over, the guys were just laughing their heads off at them. At the end of the whole thing they were forced to walk through a blackened tunnel that had a "Jason" head in the corner, Anna really didn't want to walk through it but then she realized that the head wasn't moving and that she should be safe. They started their venture through the tunnel, the 2 young girls were in the front of Anna and Candy, Becky was behind Candy and the men were behind all of them talking amongst themselves. They were almost to the end of the tunnel when that Jason head started running after them and started up a chainsaw. Anna and Candy Screamed their heads off pushed the 2 young girls out of their way which entailed them to go tumbling to the ground and ran all the way to the end of the line OUTSIDE of the attraction, STILL SCREAMING THEIR HEADS OFF. Anna felt bad for trampling over 2 innocent little girls, so did Candy. They waited for the rest of the group at the car. THe rest of the group where laughing so hard that they had tears running down their cheeks. "It's not funny, guys, please stop laughing. Are those 2 girls alright?" Anna asked. Eric nodded his head at her, "Yeah, they are laughing at you the two of you just about as hard as we are." He snickered. Candy playfully punched him in the stomach. "Shut up".

    They all laughed, and got in the car, and left with memories for the rest of their lives.

    End of story.

    Here's the funny part, I tell you I seriously thought I had injured one of those poor little girls, yes I am "ANNA" lol. I Wanted to make it seem like a "ghost" story or something and not a memory. HEHEH did I have you all fooled ????

    In all seriousness those 2 girls were aboslutely fine, Doug, who was actually my boyfriend Scott, and Eric who was my friend Tamecca's boy friend Justin, helped them up and made sure they returned to their parents safely, as I and Candy, who was my friend Lisa, really just about pissed our pants all the way to the f'in car!!!!

    Thursday, October 12, 2006

    So here I am....

    I'm alot better than I was yesterday. I was like numb yesterday, I've been in "duh" mode the last 2 days...ever since that happeend at work yesterday. I do appreciate everyones concern, I'm okay, for now I have a job, FOR NOW = key words. A shout out to my girl Rach, man you have no idea how much I needed laughs the last couple of days, I'm so glad you we have a way to chat online during the work day, THANK YOU BUNCHES!!! I did get paid they paid us out of the other companys checking account. But that company is also in the same boat as this one, I think the agents said they would be back sometime next week for them. It's all like a really bad B movie, lol.

    Here's what I know, and it's VERY little information, but I can give some light on the situation.

    I am assuming that the company for some odd reason unknown to mankind are behind in paying payroll taxes and sales tax. Wish I gather is a BIG NO NO, I mean come on I don't have a business of my own but don't ya like have to pay that shit?!? The agents came in yesterday like I said seized all the money in the office for the company I work for (there are 2 different companys in this office), checks cash, cash off the owner himself, yes he had to give up his personal cash that were on his persons (i love that word, that's the word the agent used, persons), and froze the bank account. But once they got all their money they were unfreezing the account, which is a good thing, I mean I think we have maybe 2 more payperiods before we are swimming in nothing but shit.

    That's all I know...I tried to just sit at my cubicle and ignore the whole ordeal. But my heart was pounding like crazy, it was like back in the day when I was high or getting high (yes um i smoked that wacky weed back in the day) and I would see a cop and my heart would like stop then all the sudden beat out of my chest, yeah, it was a pleasent feeling.

    I registered with Kansas Job Link today, they are a government based employement agency, they help dislocated workers find jobs. I'm not YET a dislocated worker, but soon will be one. Myself and the other 3 girls in the office put in for the airplane factory in the town, they are hiring a bunch of people. I would probably stay at the same pay rate, and get health bennefits, but there's a catch, I have NEVER done factory work before. I'm afraid that I will get passed over someone with more experience, although experience is not necessary they train you for whatever department you are going into.

    I can wait it out and just leave when they finally just shut the doors on the business and become a "dislocated" worker, and get school realeased job training, and that way i can draw unemployement and not have to actually have 2 contacts a week, meaning that I would have to at least inquire on 2 potential jobs a week. If this is the case, which is what James wants me to do, go back to school and get my nursering degree, but that's easier said then done. Granted I am half way there, but I can't draw unemployement, go to school, and keep my apartment, it's just not going to be that easy. I'm not going to make what I am making now on unemployement. There's just no way. I'm not moving back home I already told mymom that I would freeze this winter before I did that! I'm stubborn.

    I knew this day would come, it's been working on itself for more than a year now. I just didn't want to have to face it. I love my job, granted there are some aspects of it I can do without, but for the most part I love it, and I love my co-workers, well now since Miss Lazy Ass is gone!

    Maybe I need a break from working, maybe I should just wait until i can draw that unemployement and just take a break from life for a while. I will have to give up some things of course, like cable tv, and such, which is a total bummer in itself, i will NOT give up the internet there is NO WAY IN HELL, lol. Maybe the cable internet, but I will have some sort of connection to my outside world!!!

    I won't starve, the pups will not starve, we will not freeze to death I will just have to be very consertive with the heat while I'm in the low blow. Many people a day become dislocated workers, if they can do it I can do it too. I just will not run back home and have mommy and daddy help me. I have been on my own for almost 2 years now, and I LOVE it, i don't want to be under someones thumb, nor do I want to follow some 60 and 70 year olds rules...when I have basically been living ruleless (is that a word?) for this long, NO WAY IN HELL, lol. Don't get me wrong I love my mom and my dad and I'm so thankful that if I do not succeed in my quest that there is somewhere I can go that will be warm and I will have food to eat. Oh that's another plus with not much money coming in, I will be loosing the weight, LOL, see I can make a bad situation into a good one!!!

    Well that's all for now, that's all I know, and lets just hope that I can get on at the airplane plant, their next class is november 7th which is orientation, lets hope I'm one of the ones sitting in there learning how to build real airplanes!

    Wednesday, October 11, 2006


    (Barngoddess this song is for you and me both!!!!, and yes it does not pertain to my post, all the songs i want to play are not available which adds to my GRRRR!!!)

    I'm not stressed persay, i'm a little overwhelmed at this moment. All the crap that happened today, and trying to figure out HOW the hell i'm going to pay all my crap AHEAD of time to keep up to date. I don't know. I don't know how unemloyment works either, i know it's based on how long you've worked for the company and all that, maybe i can draw it and hope to make ends meet?? I have not a damn clue. I normally wouldn't disclose this but I get paid well to sit on my ass all day and answer the phones almost 12 bucks an hour, why i have no money to show for it is beyond me. Money burns holes in my pockets, it used to not be that way I horded money all the time I was always the richest kid in high school. WHAT THE FLIP HAPPENED?!?! I learned there was a world out there with all this great shit that I had to have right then...pffft...i wish i didn't even know that now.

    It's not the end of the world, but It sure the hell feels like it. I'm not about to mention this crap to the parents, all I'll hear is "we told you so", seeing that this has been 1 year since the first time we about lost our jobs. Thankfully i have almost 2 years in with the company now. That's helpful with the unemployement part.

    *SIGHS* Oh well, we all have shit we have to endure in our life don't we? This year as been VERY crappy for me. It all started out with it being the best year of my life, was to get married, be happy, (could have been pregnant by now), to, not being married, loosing my job, being flat ass broke, and not having nothing to show for a job that I got paid well at...YIPPIEE....I can't wait for the year to be over, and the new one to start...surely it's got to be better than this one right?!?!?!

    What a day...

    What a day it has been and it's not EVEN monday. GRRR.

    This chickadee will probably be jobless in oh about a month. Yeah, all the shit hit the fan today!

    FBI came in (yes the real FBI, I was like they are Real?!?!) came in and seized all of our cash and checks that were in the office, yeah, and also froze our bank accounts. And it's payday. GREAT EH?

    OH what a day....

    Monday, October 09, 2006

    Um...It's Monday ICK!

    So, yeah, it's Monday, and I say big fat ICKIE on that! It's not been bad at work today I have my friend Rach to keep me company on boring days such as this. :) Love ya Rach!

    I took a water pill this morning, DON'T EVAH take one of those, I have peed 10 times since I have been here today. I used to take a water pill every other day with my diet pill (prescribed thank you very much) but lately I've had to pee alot with out the pill, so in taking that pill this morning, I think I majorly did a NO NO. LOL.

    Yesterday I bawled my eyes out on a movie that I have seen 500 million times, Benji (the very first Benji evah made, which is the best one!). Jade watched the entire movie with me, she sat on my lap looking at the screen tilting her head at the screen, when I came to the part of the little white doggie getting kicked by the bad man (hint the reason why i cried) she let out a deep sigh and looked at me, she looked like she was about to cry herself...poor puppy dog, thank gawd we weren't watching Old Yeller!

    I have no working phone service, went to call my mom and dad yesterday, and dial tone. So I let my phone company now (um I AM THE PHONE COMPANY, LOL) I can't do anything until the tech can come fix my one and only jack in my house. Damnit!

    I'm thinking that I am going to do a Video blog sometime this week, I'm THINKING, I don't know if i'm going to do it or not. I think maybe a video blog 1 time a week would be cool, don't you?!?!

    Well, I probably better get back to work, or non working is actually what i'm doing right now. I think maybe read a book watch a few videos on YouTube, that would be cool what do you think?

    LOL, Have a nice CRAPPY MOnday!!!

    Sunday, October 08, 2006

    Warning: a very um...Womanly post, lol.

    Hope you like the song with this post, and yes i realize that it does not pertain to my post!!!

    OH GOD how sometimes I despise being a damn woman at times. Like now, CRAMPS, my GAWD, sometimes I just want to rip my own insides out. GRRRR....

    I mean I know the whole reason we as women have to have this disgusting time of the month, it's so we can reproduce, but why does it have to be so damn painful?

    I have ran out of my life saver Naproxen, and I can't get it refilled until I go back to the doctor to ask him to write me another script for it. I think I'm actually going to get a pap done this time. This is just getting ridiculous.

    I started yesterday, then I stopped, for like 12 hours, and then started again, with the Most FIERCE cramps ever known to woman kind. I ended up taking 16 advil within a 3 hour period, which yes, I know, that is not good at all. But the pain HAD to be gone, you don't understand me and pain, we aren't a good couple.

    I fear that day that I go into labor, I fear the man that puts me in the position! Yes, he will pay! LOL.

    I'm one of the few people that do not like a whole lot of attention when they are in pain, don't touch me, don't talk to me, just leave the HELL alone. That's for any kind of pain. You can ask my gal Laura, she knows all about the "bitch" in me coming out if you try to help me when I have fallen and hurt myself.

    When I'm in pain the best thing to do is just ask me if I need anything if it's like a toothache, bachache or even cramps. If I have fallen and hurt myself (yes, um, I've been known to do that a few times in my life, LOL, I'm a clutz!) the best bet for you is to stand at least 4 feet away, ask me if i'm okay, if I don't answer that's cool, don't ask me again and DO NOT TRY TO HELP ME UP, or I just may bite your head off. I don't care if people laugh at me even before they ask me if I'm alright, but just don't get in my "space". It takes me a while to come to terms with 1. I've just embarassed (sp?) myself 2. I'm hurt and 3 I'll be alright.

    I don't cry when I'm hurt, sure I have tears that come to my eyes, but I don't cry. I cuss, oh boy does the sailor in me come out then. My famous phrase when I hurt myself (excuse my french) is "Fucking piece of shit" yup you read that right, that's not even a real sentence, but that is what comes out of my mouth each and everytime I hurt myself.

    Cramps, yeah I hate em. I feels like my uterus is just gonna fall right out of my butt, i know graphic, but hey I warned you in my title.

    THe worse for me is throwing up...I hate doing it to begin with, if i can fight the urge to throw up i'm all for it. I know you'll feel better once you do it, but to me it's the most disgusting thing in the world and I hate doing it. But i've done it 4 times since yesterday, it's the period talking, I have a lot of hormones during my time of the month.

    You know when people have morning sickness while they are pregnant? Yeah, I get that way on my period, and before it too. A smell or a sound (yes a sound) will set me off. I believe it to be to many hormones in my body at one time, you'd think I would of gone to a doctor for this a long time ago, nope, just bared with it. I mean there really isn't anything they can do for me, I has to run it's course right?

    Oh gawd and the hot flashes SHIT MAN. I'm going through one right now. I hate hot flashes they are the most miserable thing ever. Then the chills afterwards, why do we have to suffer like this? GRRRR....

    Well I think I've said enough to gross out the 1 guy reader I have in this group, sorry Brian!!! LOL. I think it's time to go and take a bath, and feel better I HOPE!!!

    Saturday, October 07, 2006

    Tagged again

    I was reading more into Barngoddess (i guess I missed that post), and saw where she tagged anyone who wanted to be tagged :P So I'm doing this one as well.

    List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your Live Journal/blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they’re listening to.

    Pussycat Dolls - Buttons

    I'm telling you loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh)
    But you keep fronting (Uh)
    Saying what you going to do to me (Uh huh)
    But I ain't seen nothing (Uh)

    Hardly the type I fall for
    I'm liking the physical
    Don't leave me asking for more
    I'm a sexy mama (Mama)
    Who knows just how to get what I want and (Want and)
    What I want to do is spring this on you (On you)
    Back up all of the things that I told you (Told you)

    (Yes I realize that's just a little out there!! LOL but it's my favorit song right now)

    Evanescence - Call Me When You're Sober

    Don't cry to me.
    If you loved me,
    You would be here with me.
    You want me,
    Come find me.
    Make up your mind.

    Should I let you fall?
    Lose it all?
    So maybe you can remember yourself.
    Can't keep believing,
    We're only deceiving ourselves .
    And I'm sick of the lie,
    And you're too late.

    Nickelback - Animals

    I, I'm driving black on black
    Just got my license back
    I got this feeling in my veins this train is coming off the track
    I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride
    Because the angel on my right ain't hanging out with me tonight
    I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out
    I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run
    Your mom don't know that you were missing
    She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing

    No, we're never gonna quit
    Ain't nothing wrong with it
    Just acting like we're animals
    No, no matter where we go
    'Cause everybody knows
    We're just a couple of animals

    Nirvana - Lithium

    I'm so happy. Cause today I found my friends.
    They're in my head. I'm so ugly. But that's ok.
    'Cause so are you. We've broke our mirrors.
    Sunday morning. Is everyday for all I care.
    And I'm not scared. Light my candles. In a daze cause I've found god.

    Yeah [x bunch of times]

    I'm so lonely. And that's ok.
    I shaved my head. And I'm not sad. And just maybe.
    I'm to blame for all I've heard. And I'm not sure.
    I'm so excited. I can't wait to meet you there.
    And I don't care. I'm so horny. But that's ok. My will is good.

    Lisa Loeb - Stay

    you say i only hear what i want to.
    you say i talk so all the time so.

    and i thought what i felt was simple,
    and i thought that i don't belong,
    and now that i am leaving,
    now i know that i did something wrong 'cause i missed you.
    yeah, i missed you.

    and you say i only hear what i want to:
    i don't listen hard,
    i don't pay attention to the distance that you're running
    or to anyone, anywhere,
    i don't understand if you really care,
    i'm only hearing negative: no, no, no.

    Melissa Ethridge - Come to My Window

    Come to my window
    Crawl inside, wait by the light
    of the moon
    Come to my window
    I'll be home soon

    I would dial the numbers
    Just to listen to your breath
    I would stand inside my hell
    And hold the hand of death
    You don't know how far I'd go
    To ease this precious ache
    You don't know how much I'd give
    Or how much I can take

    Sheryl Crow - First Cut is The Deepest

    I would have given you all of my heart
    But there's someone who's torn it apart
    And he's taken just all that I had
    But if you want I'll try to love again
    Baby, I'll try to love again but I know


    The first cut is the deepest
    Baby I know the first cut is the deepest
    But when it comes to being lucky he's cursed
    When it comes to loving me he's worst

    These songs are not only what I love to listen to while I'm sitting at the computer but they are the songs that are on my playlist under the file All Time Favorite Songs...just so you now I have lots more too :)

    and I'm putting in an 8th song because i wanna! Plus this song is number 1 on my's the only song she has ever sung that I like!!! I love the video...I also drove my mother nuts blaring it out of my bedroom when I was in one of my many "moods" i had when I grew up!!!

    I'm playing in on this post and I'm posting all the lyrics

    Fiona Apple - Criminal

    I've been a bad bad girl
    I've been careless with a delicate man
    And it's a sad sad world
    When a girl will break a boy
    Just because she can
    Don't you tell me to deny it
    I've done wrong and I want to
    Suffer for my sins
    I've come to you 'cause I need
    Guidance to be true
    And I just don't know where I can begin

    What I need is a good defense
    'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
    And I need to be redeemed
    To the one I've sinned against
    Because he's all I ever knew of love

    Heaven help me for the way I am
    Save me from these evil deeds
    Before I get them done
    I know tomorrow brings the consequence
    At hand
    But I keep livin' this day like
    The next will never come

    Oh help me but don't tell me
    To deny it
    I've got to cleanse myself
    Of all these lies till I'm good
    Enough for him
    I've got a lot to lose and I'm
    Bettin' high
    So I'm beggin' you before it ends
    Just tell me where to begin

    What I need is a good defense
    'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
    And I need to be redeemed
    To the one I've sinned against
    Because he's all I ever knew of love

    Let me know the way
    Before there's hell to pay
    Give me room to lay the law and let me go
    I've got to make a play
    To make my lover stay
    So what would an angel say
    The devil wants to know

    What I need is a good defense
    'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
    And I need to be redeemed
    To the one I've sinned against
    Because he's all I ever knew of love

    What I need is a good defense
    'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
    And I need to be redeemed
    To the one I've sinned against

    Because he's all I ever knew of love


    Felinefrisky tagged me, I love tags:) This has to do with 5's.

    1) Five Minutes to yourself. How would you spend them ideally?
    Curled up in my favorite recliner, with a blanket, cup of coffee, and a good book.

    2)Five Dollars to spend right now. How and where would you spend it?
    Some more bread and milk, from the grocery store.

    3)Five Items in your house you could part with right now.
    My stereo, my telephone, my vcr, part of my book collection, my VHS tapes.

    4)Five Items in your house you positively, absolutely could never part with.
    Computer, DVD Player, books, tv, and my puppy dogs!

    5)Five Words you love.
    Yipes, love, puppy dogs, movie, peace.

    Now I tag hmm...if you've been tagged by someone else you don't have to do this again! LOL.

    Rachel, Rebecca, Lisa, Redneckgirl...and Diana (you can post on my comments diana :).

    Friday, October 06, 2006

    Everyone *Clap*...It is FRIDAY!!!

    So, yes, it's Friday, YIPPEE!! What I'm going to do this weekend I have not the foggest clue. I don't know if James and I will hang out or not, I'm sure we will. My ex G and his wife are buying my landlords house (his grandmother, and the house next to the garage apartment) so their whole flippin' family will be there this weekend, I really dont' want to be around...that will some what weird.

    I was watching Jay Leno last night, just for a couple of minutes, he had Bob Newhart on. They were chatting and I dont' remember where this topic came from but Bob started telling a story of 'Kids say the darnest things' and there was this little boy in the back who was not participating, and at commercial break the host (not bill cosby i know that much LOL), asked him what was the matter? The little boy said "my dog died this morning", and the host said "i'm so sorry to hear that, but your dog is up in doggy heaven, and a long long time from now you will die too and you will go up to heaven and you will see your doggy again." and the boy looked at him and said "What would God want with a dead dog?" I busted up laughin. Well in his mind he was right, it's dead it's not good, but kids do say the darnest things!

    I know I have been sparce on the posting and i am sorry. I've been SOOOO tired lately and no energy to think up things to post. Last night I went to bed BEFORE 6pm, and woke up at 11pm (hint when I watched jay leno). I didn't even mean to fall asleep I was just going to lay there, and listen to King of Queens, and well i was out like a light!

    I have no idea what is wrong with me...but I'm kinda getting tired of being tired, lol, if that makes any sense!

    Well gots to go back to work TAKE CARE!

    Thursday, October 05, 2006

    Bored...bored...BORED....bored...yeah I'm bored

    Just thought I share the boredom with you all. I have 3 more minutes left of work THANK GAWD...GOOD GAWD this day has been the longest one known to man kind!!! Plus I'm starvin marvin!

    Tuesday, October 03, 2006

    My "Children"

    I was wondering over at
  • Felinefriskies
  • , and read her story about her beautiful boy "Tucker" and how he came to be part of her and her husbands family. It got me thinking and I am going to share with you how my "children" came about to let me be their proud mommy.

    First there is "Katelyn" but as everyone refers her to "Katie", my mother calls her "Katie Bug" or "Doodle Bug", she is very much a grandma's granddaughter, lol. Well as much as a dog can be, but remember I have no children of my own, so this was really the first "grandbaby" from me to my parents. I refer to Katie as "Katie Doo Doo", "Dooder head" and "Mamma's girl", she answers to all of the above names, she's a bit confused I do believe.

    Katie was born on January 21st, 2003, course I didn't know this until after I got her. I mean, I myself didn't give birth to her. Around late February of that year my father finally gave in and allowed me to get another dog, my precious poodle "Jeni", who I had since the age of 5 years old, was put down 3 years prior to this. My mom so desperatly tried to get my father to allow me (at this time I was 23 years old) to have another dog. He refused as they already had 3 of their own. Like I said it was late February and my mom came in one evening and said, here is the "Good News" (a weekly wednesday type want ad paper our community puts out), and she circled the available pets. "Dad said you can get a dog of your choice." I about flipped.

    Originally I wanted a Yorkie or a Pomerianan (i spelt that wrong), I wanted my "FrooFroo" puppy. You know one I could put in a pet purse and dote around like those famouse idiots do. But all of them were so expensive at least 500 dollars if not more, I worked at Wal-Mart, and there was no way I could afford a 500 dollar dog. Plus mom didn't think that a FROOFROO dog would be the best with 2 weenies already and a pointer, plus her inhome daycare. She suggested another weener. So I relunctly said "Okay".

    But in this news paper there wasn't any good animal adds so I called around to the area's vets and got the names and numbers of dachshund breeders. I called one up and she said "Yes, I have a little of 4 week old puppies. They are called 'Piebald' and they are mostly white." Well i wasn't interested. I read in the dog books that any white on a weenie was considered a "flaw". I tried this elderly woman that stated her pup was gonna be a "Teeney Tiney Mini" and I was very interested in this one, it was a black and tan (i love them they look like mini rots or min pins), but she was not available to be viewed for another 2 weeks. GOOD GAWD, I couldn't wait that long. So I went on ahead with the first breeder with the "flawed" dogs, lol.

    My mom drove me out to the breaders house and we met her, she was a nice German lady, very heavy accent. She had a Chiahuaha (i spelt that wrong) whose name was "Spike" and he lived up to his name, a mean little shit! I viewed the 2 females of the new litter, she also had a male, but my mom wouldn't allow a male, as they tend to pee on everything. She picked up these to very small and teeney puppies. One was shaking really bad and kept her eyes shut (their eyes were opened by then) and her nose in the air. My mom held that one. The other one practically leaped out of the breaders arms into my arms. She started licking my face and wagging her cute little tail. I looked at mom, and she looked at me, "I knew it." She said. We were only there to view, not buy. I told the lady that the one I'm holding is the one I wanted, this would of been my Katie Doo Doo, I put a deposit on her that night, 50.00.

    I couldn't pick her up for another 4 weeks, GOOD GAWD those 4 weeks dragged by so freaking slow! But it did give me a chance to get the "nursery" up and ready. LOL, the NURSERY! Which was really just a glorified dog cage with everything that a little 8 week old puppy could ever want or need!!

    I had this "special" pink blanket I had bought, for her "homecoming" this was the blanket that I would wrap her up in and bring her home in. It was soft and cuddly. My dad drove me out to the breader at the end of that very long 4 week stretch. I went in and paid the breader the rest of the mula, an additional 325.00 (she went up 25.00 that she quoted me at the time of the deposite, i didn't care, i just borrowed money from dad, until we got home were I paid him back). I handed her the blanket and she went out to the kennel and got Katie. I was scared she wouldn't remember which one was mine, but she brought her out, and she was just as happy to see me as the first, so I knew it was her. The breeder asked me if I had a named picked out and I said "Yes, Katelyn, or Katie for short" she just looked at me like I was strange. She said "well we've been calling her bubbles, because of her big black spots." I said cool, although I NEVER liked the name, so hince me not keeping the name! I get into the car and my dad and I drive away, this is when Katie all the sudden didn't like me, lol. I think she realized "Oh shit! Where's my family?!?" She did fine after that though.

    Katie got kennel cough almost immediatly after we brought her home. If none of you have ever experienced a dog with Kennel cough it sounds just like a real baby coughing and coughing, she kept me up. Infact I didn't sleep for almost the first 48 hours not for the cough (she didn't have it then) but because she didn't like her cage, the cage I spent a google amount of money on, and put everything she would ever need during the night in. She wanted me, but she couldn't sleep in my bed, she wasn't potty trained yet. I looked at my mom one morning and just cried she asked what's wrong "I don't know how mom's do it...that dog never stops crying!" She laughed and said it would get better. It did, until the Kennel cough set in. Once she stopped eating all together (Katie really has NEVER been a big eater, which is strange for a weenie dog), we took her to the vet. She got a shot of penacilin, oh that hurt my feelers, she yelped like she was being murdered, and then we were sent home with a bottle of penacilin to give to her 3 times a day. She drank that crap right up! LOL, must of been some good shit!

    Katie was and still is very babied. She will always be my "first born" and she can never "do wrong" lol.

    Here are some pics, 1 of when she was a wee pup, and one that is somewhat recent.

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Now comes my Jade. Or as I call her a variety of names, "Jay Jay", "Jaders", "My fat Toad", "Stinker Head", and "Mamma's baby" (not to be confused with Katies "Mamma's Girl"), Jay Jay an Stinker Head are the most to common names I call her.

    Jade was born on October 13th 2005 (she's almost 1 year!), to a woman who's dogs had an OOPS, which was the secong OOPS in 9 months that they had, lol. Guess they couldn't keep their little paws off each other! This lady is the Aunt of my supervisor, and I saw one of the puppies from the first litter when her mom adopted one a black and tanned one, it was so stinking cute.

    I had been living in my apartment for about 3 months and Katie was lonesome, and needed a friend. My parents thought it was a VERY bad idea to have 2 dogs in such a small place, but I couldn't bare to leave Katie there at home all alone anymore. Pluse my mom thought that Katie would act out if I got another dog, feeling like she wasn't loved or wanted anymore. I took this in consideration, as I told my friend I was interesting in the solid black puppy, lol.

    Jade was my free puppy, I got her when she was barely 6 weeks, and barely wwined from her fat momma! Who she looks like now, fat! Jade was not as much babied as Katie was, I guess I'm a true parent, lol. I doted over my first but not so much over my second. She too had a "special" pink cuddly blanket one that said "i love my mommy" in the corner, and she too was brought home in that blanket.

    Jade was much better sleeping in the cage at night then Katie. I don't know what it was but she did much better. She did cry, but I would just open the door and put her up on the "special" bed i made for her next to my head, and calmed her down, and we would all sleep in the bed. She never did make a mess in the bed when she was that young, but I had her one 2 baby blankets and a plastic sheet so it wouldn't ruin anything, lol, just in case.

    When Jade was about 5 months old she got parvo, in which I thought she had all her shots, well I was TOLD she had all her shots. Damn vet. She was a very sick sick puppy. She had an emergency trip to the vets on a sunday mid morning, and I cried all the way there and all the way back. Dogs who get parvo are not likely to survive such a horrible disease. I thought that was the last time I would see her again. The vet told me to come back Monday after work to see how she was doing. I did so, I wasn't allowed to see her as she was in Isolation, and battling to survive, I gave the vet her beloved bunny (really a soft bunny that was a rattle, a real babies rattle), and asked her if she would please give it to Jaders. She was very willing to do so. She told me to come back Tuesday after work to see how she was doing. I did and when I walked in the receptionist said "Oh you're Jade's mom aren't you?" and I said "Yes, how is she?" and she said "Doing wonderful, I'll go get her, just go to the patient room and I'll bring her to you" I did and when she brought my precious little girl in Jade's ears purked up and her tail started wagging and she wiggled out of the receptionist arms to get to me. I reached for her and she peed all over the side of my shirt, I didn't mind though. She was hooked up to an IV bag. The vet came and said she was on her way to recovery, but she would need to stay another night or 2 in the hospital to ensure that she didn't have a set back. I got her home that Wednesday night. Katie was even happier than I was to have Jade back!

    Jade was my freebie but that trip to the vets was 500.00, that hurt, it hurt alot, but it would hurt even more if she wasn't here with us today. Then 2 weeks later she had to have her "female surger" that was another 150.00 but Ididn't want to be a grandma at the age of 26 so it had to be done.

    Jade got her name from the lady's children (the one that her little doggies had the OOPS) they were Bratz fanatics. I liked the name, so I kept it. I was originally going to name her Raven, because of her being all black. But I liked Jade better.

    Here are a couple of pictures of Jade, one from her first night with mommy (i'm not holding her my best friend Laura's mom is holding her) and one that is recent, and you can see where I call her "My fat toad".

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

    I love my children very much...and would not give them up for the world! I wish more people loved their children and their "children" in our day and age, that meaning BOTH the human kind and the furry kind, but unfortuniatly they don't and I feel so bad for those children (both types) who aren't loved.

    Now to my Bob Barker's quote "Please have your pets spade and nueatared (ispelt that wrong)".

    (it took me until 8:15 pm to post type all this...I really need to type faster!!)


    HEHEHE I just love not being creative on titles..!!

    Well it has happened again, some sick man took his lived grudges out on innocent victims. What is our world coming to? And to do it against such very carying, god loving, individuals? Really who kills the Amish? Really who ever has had a beaf with an Amish person? I don't understand. I guess he didn't do it because they were Amish it was just out of convience, and did it because he had thoughts of molesting again. Um...okay. I don't understand people these days. It just sickens me and saddens my heart that there are people out their that would actually do such a thing. 3 times in the past week this has happened, we need to somehow put a stop to it, but I don't know what that "how" is.

    It makes me NOT want to bring children into this world. I mean with all that is going on these days, who would want to bring a life into this evil? I know we have and will always will face evil, but this is becoming more and more ridiculous (sp?). I just don't know....

    Monday, October 02, 2006

    Oh How I depise Mondays!!

    Well if it is not obvious with the title I REALLY HATE MONDAYS!!! I hate being able to sleep in for 2 days, and then am so rudely awakened by the alarm clock at 5:30 on Monday mornings...GRRRR....

    See you know what I did on saturday...for the rest of the day I slept...and slept some more...I think I was tired...(no really!?!). Then I got up and watched some tv, but I went back to bed around 9pm and slept all night.

    Sunday I got up around 8 something in the morning, and got around and went and got coffee and some crossword scratch off lottery tickets (didn't win a darn thing) and went out to the duck pound and read some newspapers and scratched my lottery tickets and then went back home, watched some movies from Netflix, and then shampooed my carptes. Which now smell very purdy if you ask me.

    Packed up the shampooer and the little ankle biters, and went to my parents house (The shampooer was theres). The doggies played and played and played some more for 2 hours in the back yard. But first I was an idiot that did no lift up on my parents back gate, and I guess a gust of wind blew it open. 3 out of the 5 dogs, Missy (my dads pointer), Abby (my mom's weenie dog), and My Miss Jade were all enjoying themselves in the front yard. Katie and Annie (my mom's other weenie dog) were good girls and didn't go out the gate. I was throughouly bawled out by my bad!

    Katie and Jade were in rare form, I forgot to take my digital camera to take pics of them prancing around in the big back yard (it's really not that big, but to them it is)!. Although right now my computer and digital camera are seeming to have a little tiff with each other, so I'm trying to figure out what it is.

    Katie and jade slept and slept and slept from 4:00pm to around 7pm last night, while I watched Dances with Wolves for about the millionth time. Who can not resist seeing Kevin Costner butt naked in that bathing scene?!?! Hmmm...NOT ME!!!

    for the last 2 weeks I have had to pee like no other (WHOA TMI?!?!) Ever time I drink something in about 5 minutes it goes right through me. Hmmm....I don't know...I get up at least 4 times to go to the bathroom before I finally can get some sleep when I go to bed at night.

    O, also I'm getting fat..yup fat...that's sad, GRRRR...why didn't anyone tell me that I was getting fat???!!! I don't know.

    Well I guess I probably better get back to work, have a GREAT MONDAY (if that is such a possibility!!!).